February 19, 2009

I remember you, Heaven

As dictated by Faranza Syns

WARNING: PG-13, parents' guidance advised.





First off, I want to hug, kiss and molest rape devour Jordan. Okay, maybe I'm feeling this way because of the way he replied to a question of mine. If you dare sit there on your chair, all comfy, saying that you're so cocksure of yourself and you don't need an ego-booster ever, I will personally go there and rape sodomise maim you and your wonderful assets. See if you need an ego-booster after that kind of treatment.





Today was ... slow paced. I guess it's all due to saringan and dress-rehearsal. The form fives had an AddMaths class with Pn.Zuraimah. Oh mah gad, I am going to kidnap her one day and force her to teach me AddMaths. No offence to other teachers, but when she taught me, I understood. No blinking blurly, faking a look of comprehension, and then killing myself ten-thousand times trying to fathom what the teacher was talking about. Ruz, I like your Mom. But I don't think she likes me. Ah well.



After recess, we went to the library, and stayed there for the rest of the day. Sat at the round, shimmery glass table with Mei Yin, Amanda and a few other people. I was studying Biology.



Yeah, right. If I could shut my mouth long enough to get in the functions of ribosomes, I'd be really surprised. Once, me, Amanda and Jet discussed politics. It was fun. I did quite well, I suppose. It must because I understood and believed in what I was talking about.



Pity. If I'd spoken with that measure of conviction during the Inter-school Debate Competition, we could've screwed SAB silly.





___________________________




Jordan: You know we got a BSL?
Me: Yeah, I know.
Jordan: All because our class was dirty.
Me: What happened?
Jordan: It's all the Interact Club's
fault!

Me: What did they do? Have sex in the
place?







* * * *




(Name replaced with letters for
discretion)

XH: Do you know what "A" did? *asks in a conspirational
way*

Me: What?
XH: Do you guys know what "A" did?
Me: What? What?
XH: ....
Me: *gasp!* He HAD SEX.


That got the attention of Amanda, Jordan and the others. Mind, we were in the library, but it was still rather noisy.



Jordan: HE HAD SEX?
Amanda: He did?!
Me: No la. *grin*
XH: NO, HE DIDN'T. *gives me irritated look*





If only the answers in life were as simple as how I answered them.



But then again, sex makes things complicated, no? Ah well. Thank god I'm not having it, then.





______________________________








I was sitting, trying to memorise Bio facts. Then I heard the word prom. It turns out Xin Huei was telling Mei Yin that she didn't want to attend prom.



Ooh, Mommy and Daughter are alike, eh, hun?




Me: I don't want to attend prom, too.
XH: *beams, high fives* We can have our own party.
Me: Yeah!





And Jordan listened in.



Jordan: Eh, eh? What?

Me: I'm not going to prom.

Jordan: Why not?

Me: What's the point?

Jordan: I'll be wearing nice clothes, so you'd better come and wear pretty
clothes.






Spoken like my true Romeo.





Me: I'm un-dateable, Jordan. What kind of guy wants me?

Mei Yin: Eh, you don't know, okay?

Amanda: Yeah, the world's a wide place, and who knows?

Xin Huei: Yeah, who knows? There could be men who like you.





At that point, I was... very, very touched. The way everyone stood up and strived to make me feel better about myself... I was just really touched.



Me: Yeah, right. What kind of a girl do guys want? *looks at
Jordan*

XH: Some guys like girls who are hot, some like girls who are pretty, and
some want sexy girls.

Me: Hnn. See?

Jordan: Yeah, but there are also guys who like girls who are cute. You
know.

XH: Yeah. *nods*






'Kay, people, slap me for being ungrateful. I have great, wonderful friends. Jordan's the closest I'll get to ever ask a guy if I've slimmed down.



Me: Jordan, do I look a little slimmer? *asks
teasingly*


Jordan: Got meh? I didn't notice. *continues doing his
work*


Me: =_="






And since I asked Amanda to compare me with girl "B" just a few moments before, she decided to ask Jordan the same question.




Amanda: Okayla, between Far and "B", who's slimmer?
Jordan: I don't know. I
didn't notice.
Me: =____=''





But later on, when me and Amanda discussed my weight, and so on, with the word "slim" kept being tossed around, Jordan suddenly snapped to attention.




Jordan: Why do you want to be slimmer? No need to be slimmer la. I like you
like this. So cute.
Someone: Cute, right? *eager*
Jordan: I wanna pinch your cheeks. No need to be slimmer, la.
Me: Haha.




Aww, thank you, people. I love you all so much. And Amanda, thanks for answering a lethal question so gracefully. Haha.




Me: Between me and "B", who's slimmer.
Amanda: *Thinks deeply*
Me: *waits*
Amanda: You. You're slimmer.
Me: How much slimmer?
Amanda: *annoyed* Look at it this way: if you went on a
binge for 3 months, then you'd catch up with her.

Me: Three months?
Amanda: Okay, I meant one week, but if I said it, you'd
be crushed, so I said three months.







Haha. Thanks. I feel really appreciated. Really. My Romeo, my daughter, my friend, my neighbour. You know who you are, so know that I'll love you guys always.


Munch-and-Kisses. Except Jordan. Eesh. Haha.

Note to self: Never talk to Yee Ming about obsessions.

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